Paint

As the days go by I am beginning to find myself frustrated with the routine that I have established. What once was comforting is now irritating, the monotony is starting to take its toll. It's almost as though I contracted the mid-semester blues like so many of did in college. Those classes we were so excited to take consistently fell from grace after 7 weeks in the classroom. Yet I can now change my schedule without fear of losing my scholarship and today I took full advantage of the freedom to do so.

I silenced the alarms on my phone and quickly gathered materials, the smile on my face returning as I stared at the blank canvas before me. Back and forth my brush began adding layer upon layer of color, bringing life and warmth to what was once cold and barren.

I used the dark to outline the bright, to highlight the richness within, and as I examined my work I couldn't help but wonder if our lives werw any different?

It is so easy for me to imagine God...shading and developing me into the servant He wants me be. Yet upon closer inspection it is with life that He paints. The joys and sorrows, the laughter a and the tears, all blended together to make a thing of wonder. What if it is those times of darkness that truly amplify His light? What if it only through the trials that we finally see the beauty of the work He is creating no matter how painful it may be?

Inspiration

I had planned on sharing the design board for little bit #3's nursery today but apparently my laptop has contracted a mega virus. Sad story I know...I am just praying it comes back quickly and completely restored lol! So instead I am going to leave you with the fabric that inspired the whole room. I wanted something feminine but not girly, bright but not over the top. What do you think?

Tuesday Top Ten

Yesterday was rough but just as the darkness seemed like it was going to overcome me the Lord provided evidence of His Son.  I wish I knew how to navigate this road a little better but the as I was surrounded by unexpected blessings I realized that the light was there I just needed to open my eyes. 

 

I thought it only fitting to list some of the things that are making me grin...

 

1. Flowers from my pretty momma.
2. SF grapefruit flavored water.  Mixed with orange juice over ice...AMAZING!
3. My large field embroidery machine came back the repair center.  Praying it works now!
4. Out of the blue texts to check on me and little bit #3.
5. Sweet surprise from an old friemd.
6. SF French Vanilla Latte...need I say more?
7. Love that girl.
8. Unexpected blessing from a dear friend..
9. Paired with 10 = the PERFECT snack
10. See above.  Does admitting I am addicted make it ok?

 

When the Rain Comes

I am tired of this game.  Today marks our half way point, 47 days spent in bed or on the couch, 6 and a half weeks spent rewiring myself from staunchly independent to willingly dependent.  I marked this day on my calendar thinking it would be one of excitement and celebration.  Instead, it has been one of anxiety and darkness.  The thought of 47 MORE days spent doing the same is enough to send me into a downward spiral.  One where sleep envelopes me, gently providing at least a temporary respite from the reality of this thing called bed rest.

I understand that this situation is temporary.  That blessings are tiny specs of light in the this midnight colored world and that I must only lift my eyes to the heavens in order to see them.  But to be honest even that simple act seems too much right now.  I can feel myself pulling away, retreating into the depths of my own self trying to cope yet feeling so inadequate.  At least the darkness feels authentic, the light feels artificial. 

Tears flow over the strangest situations further indicating the extent of my instability, yet even in this I cling to the fact that darkness can only last for a time.  Just as day repeatedly banishes the night, the blessings will once again outweigh the inconveniences if I allow them to.  God has ordained my time here and I will praise Him through this storm, when the winds rage and the rains come, I will praise Him.